Poughkeepsie

Lana looked as though she were one of the most boring people in the world. She was tall, gaunt, and looked as though she were a librarian. Each of her delicate features were somewhat hardened by her generally stand-offish demeanor.
Her life was boring and foolish, and she sometimes regretted this fact. Though, she never did anything to change her circumstances.
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6:00 AM
I wake up because the sun is starting to shine in my eyes. I have no recollection of my dreams from the night before, but I am sure nothing important happened. I quickly slip on my robe as my feet grace the ice-cold floor. It's rough getting up this early, but I know I wouldn't have been able to stay in bed any longer. I look into the mirror and I see a person that looks so lost. There are lines that are starting to form along my eyes. I run my fingers along the lines and a snarl forms across my face. I can't believe I'm already this old.
6:15 AM
I can feel the water beating up against my back. I turn the shower a little hotter since I am shivering. I look down at my naked body and still feel shame despite me being all alone. I see spider veins beginning to trace up and down my thighs, making me look almost alien-esque. There is a softness growing around my stomach and I poke at it, feeling me finger sink into my skin. I stop looking at myself, definitely disgusted by what I see. I suppose this is what happens when you get older, though.
6:27 AM
I am pulling my sweater down over my head. It is a little worn around the edges and a little tighter than I would like, but it is familiar to me. I can feel my stomach cramping in hunger, and I rush to get ready. I walk out to the kitchen and stick a waffle in the toaster. I should probably be eating something healthier, but I am far too hungry for healthy. I make sure to put a large portion of syrup on the waffle and I eat in absolute silence.
7:24 AM
I am walking out to the garden to get some work done. I have it in my head that I will grow my own food and be so much more healthier. Yet, I already know that my plants are going to die and I am going to keep putting the same crap into my mouth. I kneel down in front of the tomato patch and begin picking the weeds away. Even though it is a brisk morning, I am already sweating from the labor. I take out all of my frustration on these weeds. I mutilate and massacre them. I am finally done and am thoroughly exhausted.
8:30 AM
I am getting into my car. I am almost to big for the tiny vehicle, as my head grazes the ceiling. I start up the engine and I can tell that it's going to die soon. Just another stress to add to my life. I pull out of the driveway and I look at my abnormally normal house. Perhaps there is nothing special about me…
8:57 AM
I am at the market and I am strolling through the harshly-lighted aisles, looking for my specific kind of shampoo. I realize that there are hundreds of other brands of shampoo, but I want mine. I browse through each section carefully, running my fingers across the various bottles. I am starting to get frustrated by the fact that I cannot find my brand. I do not want these other shampoos; they disgust me. I am not paying attention to where I am walking, consumed by my desire. I bump into something fairly soft. I look up and it is a person.
"Careful." The man admonishes as I stare at him blankly.
"I'm sorry," I murmur.
He is a fairly stocky gentleman, with thinning brown hair and strong eyebrows. His face is framed by thick glasses that look like they were made out of Coke bottles. He looks like he would naturally be a very jolly man, but he currently has a frown on his face. I find him oddly endearing, though he isn't particularly attractive.
"It's fine, just watch where you're going next time." He says in a quick, yet considerate manner.
He nods to me as he walks back down the aisle. I quickly forget why I am at the market in the first place.
9:13 AM
I am following this gentleman throughout the supermarket. I am not sure why I am doing this, but I am anxious to know this man better. He is the first person in a very long time that has so much as acknowledged my presence. I make it a little game as I follow him ever do discretely. I try to guess what item he is picking up from the shelves. I have a perfect score. I cannot believe how close I feel to this man. I think I am in love. I become more bold in my tailing of this gentleman. I make no pretenses about following him. I am like a lost puppy now.
9:18 AM
The gentleman finally stops his shopping and turns towards me. He walks up to me deliberately, in a manner most unbecoming.
"What the hell do you want, lady?" He is almost shaking in fury.
I shy away from him slightly, not wanting the object of my adoration to turn on me. I appreciate how close he is to me. For the briefest of moments I think about kissing him, but I don't want to cause any trouble.
"I-I-… I thought you looked interesting. I followed you around to get to know you better." I try to look flirtatious when doing this, but I know I am failing miserably.
He seems almost taken aback by this idea that someone finds him attractive. I can see the mixed emotions running across his face. He takes several steps away from me, opens his mouth and quickly shuts it. He turns away and continues with his shopping. I take this as permission to keep following him
9:21 AM
The gentleman is putting some strawberry jam into his shopping cart. I can tell that he has a sweet tooth by how much sugar-saturated food he buys. I am not sure whether or not he lives alone. He is purchasing quite a bit of food, but he could just be getting it to last him a while. He is very considerate when it comes to other people in the market. He always smiles at them and tries to give them as much leeway as he can. I admire him for this.
9:37 AM
The gentleman is heading to the checkout now. I am devastated. I had no idea that out affair would be so short-lived. I hoped to stay with him forever, watching him pick out his spices and crackers. But, he is unloading his groceries onto the conveyor belt and he seems rather anxious to be done. Maybe it was something that I did to make him this way. I desperately search my mind for some kind of reason he would leave me. While my mind is caught up in the raucous of my thoughts, I just stand there and stare blankly at him. I can tell he is deeply perturbed, but I do nothing other than stare.
"Listen, lady," he yells as he stomps his feet towards me," I have been more than patient with you. Leave me the fuck alone!"
I didn't know the gentleman was capable of such obscenity. I am fascinated by his use of the word, 'fuck'. He seems to be slightly afraid of me too. He yells at me, but in an apologetic tone that makes him shrink before me. I can only stare at him. His face is twisted up together as though his skin were play-dough. His eyes are squinted as if he were deep in thought. His brow is coated with sticky sweat. I have the urge to lick that sweat right off of his brow. I don't know if I can fight my urge anymore with him standing in front me and me staring right at him.
9:38 AM
"Lady?" The gentleman asks since I haven't so much as acknowledged him yet.
I can feel other people beginning to stare now. I can feel their fear forming. They think I am crazy. That is a laughable thing; I am perfectly sane. Yet, I am looked at as a dangerous beast. But I only stare at the gentleman, my savior from the world of loneliness.
"Are you ok?" He finally whispers, showing genuine concern on his face.
Suddenly, emotions come flooding through to me like a tidal wave. I am in such despair. Such joy. Such fear. Such desire. I am not sure what to do. I stare at the gentleman and I let tears flow down my face, unafraid of what the other shoppers say.
I imagine myself and the gentleman on the beach, naked and sipping out of the same cup. We are telling each other stories of our youth. We admit our deepest fears to each other and we are laughing. It is far more perfect than any other dream I have ever had. I refuse to leave this new world.
9:42 AM
I am being forced away from my love, my gentleman. A lone security guard is pulling at my arm, almost jerking it out of its socket. I refuse to look at this intruder. He is not worth my time. I continue to look at the gentleman; he is looking back at me in disgust and horror. I know that the other shoppers are frightened and unsure how to react to this situation. They needn't worry- I am not crazy. I am just in love. There is a difference, or- at least I think so.
9:45 AM
I am being dragged out through the automated doors. The sign above my head says 'Have a Nice Day'. I chuckle a little and I get even more dirty looks from my fellow shoppers. I should feel like a common criminal, but I am perfectly fine with this. They may have temporarily prevented me from being with my love, but they cannot stop me forever.
As I walk out onto the blacktop, I am told to never return to this market again. I look up at the sign of the market again, as if it were some benevolent being that brought me love.
POUGHKEEPSIE MARKET & DELI
OPEN 24/7
Thank you, Poughkeepsie. Thank you.